Afraid of change

Why are most people afraid of change? They’re afraid of change because it’s different; it’s out of their comfort box.  They feel that if they allow change in their life that they will lose control. I will explain what I mean by control

My step father as strong as he is has a fear of change. He is always afraid of change because of the sense of not being in control. He knew where his next pay check was coming from. He knew when he needed to go to the doctor if something wasn't feeling right. He knows if he pays his rent he'll have a roof over his head. In his mind he even knew that he would have his wife around for a long time. However the day my mom got sick and until the day she died he had no control over that. He felt a sense of loss and control and he didn't know how to deal with it. He was now forced to change everything about his life. He no longer would wake up next to her (change). He would no longer be able to spend the important days that meant the most to them (change). You get what I'm saying. He was now in a place in his life where things are different and he didn't have any control over it. I watched him in pain everyday but I never realize that the one thing most people are afraid is change and that's out of our control. If you asked him today he could do anything to stop his hurt. He would tell you that he would want exchange places with my wife. This however is impossible and not going to happen.

Most people adapt to their surroundings and they become so comfortable that they don't want to change. (It also stems from the parents) You get so used to being at the same job and you don't want to change that because you've adapted to your routine, pay, and lifestyle. However you’re the same one to complain that life must have more to offer you. Well what are you doing to get out what life has to offer? Your job is a just that a job and isn't promised to you. Look how the Government Shutdown is changing people lives all around the world. There are people who work for the government that never thought they would be out of work. There are people who didn't think they were going to go without a paycheck, food stamps, benefits and so forth. So, now we have to accept this change whether we like it or not. Although it may not last forever it still has impacted a lot of people that we know. Please remember why we are all being affect by this shutdown, it’s because there is struggle between people who are unwilling to accept change. I'm not going to go into the topic about the shutdown too much. That was just my opinion of it and it fits right into what I'm talking about.

Now I used to have a problem with change. I knew I was afraid of change because things weren't going to be familiar to me anymore. I however never thought I'd be ready for any type of change. However the older I get the more I realize that if I don't change certain things in my life then I will always be in a place of feeling incomplete. Example of my fear of changing: I was used to being with my daughters’ father and I felt that he was the perfect guy for me. He cheated on me, he lied to me and he hurt me.( but I knew him and he knew me) In my mind this was something that could be fixed and I wasn't ready to be with someone else. Why, because it meant that I would have to get to know someone else. (Change) Who wanted to leave a relationship where you know your partner and he knows you. That was me (accepting a bad relationship fin fear of change) for several years but don't get it twisted I did attempt to leave. However, every time I found someone else I would get pulled back to my daughter’s father and the guy all of sudden wasn't worth my time. Sad as it maybe it happen and that's the real part of it all. It took me several years to realize that he was just holding me back from allowing someone else to love me. I am still single but I'm single because I choose to be. (Remember I'm not settling for temporary happiness) Now you get what I'm saying life is all about change and if you choose to stay content in your life but constantly complain about why. Then guess what stop being afraid of change and take baby steps. No one is saying uproot your life and just start brand new. I'm simply saying take a minute and look at what area in your life you see a need for change and start there...

My Journeys maybe long and trying but it has molded me into the person I am today! Until next time