Unsatisfied
This post may offend some and it may not but if you know like I know that the
first line already warns you. So take heed to the warning!!! The topic is about
being unsatisfied in a relationship; mentally, physically, sexually but mostly
emotionally. I often question myself when it comes to making sure that I am
satisfying my partner. I always feel like I do a good job in all areas of the
relationship but that all changes when you’re told otherwise. It blew my mind to
think that I’m doing pretty good only to be shot down and told to try again. Me,
try again, Huh. This is not happening and I know that it hasn’t happened
before. However, I guess even the most confident person can be shot down and
told that something’s isn't working. Some things like what you may be thinking
because I was thinking the same thing when I was told I wasn’t. I will go
through each word that I mentioned previously before.
Mentally: I always feel that you have to be on the same page mentally in order for the relationship to grow and progress. How can you hold a conversation by yourself when you’re supposed to be in a relationship? What I mean by that is if the maturity level isn’t there for both partners, one of you or if not both will start to look for someone else who can hold a conversation and keep the interest going. Is it wrong you say? Yes, it’s wrong but if you’ve voiced that the conversations are no longer interesting and you’ve tried; what do you do? If all you do is argue and apologize for hurting your partner's feelings then what do you do? Do you keep on trying even though you’ve lost that spark of wanting to have those long lasting conversation that you use to have? Honestly, it’s either time to move on or keep on hoping something sparks up those late night conversations again. (My advice don't hurt yourself more than you have to)
Physically: This is simple. When you first started to date your partner you found them irresistible and you only had eyes for them. Well, when find yourself starting to notice and take the interest in the people around you, you may want to find out why the sudden eye-opener. It shouldn’t take a simple argument or fight to make you take a double take at someone that you never looked at in that way. We tend to start letting ourselves go and we believe that our partners should be okay. Nope, this is not true at all. If you didn’t have a baby or you don’t have a disease that causes weight gain, acne, bloating, etc... Then you don’t have an excuse to letting yourself go. I will say this goes for me as well and I’m making a change. Not only to please my partner but to be back to my old self. I’m not saying that I let myself go completely but to know that I’m not happy with some things means to start changing them immediately! It's true and the more you deny that everything is good even though your partner has voiced that it isn’t then please don’t be surprised when their eyes start roaming or they start comparing your old pictures to your new ones. (If they’re asking about why the change in your dressing, weight, activities then you need to pay attention)
Sexually: I’m going to start off by saying that I always strive to make sure that my partner is happy in this area. I know that I have an issue with not being satisfied and to know that my partner isn’t, offend me. It offends me because if there is something that I’m not doing right or they may not like, then something should be said right then. Why wait for it to get to a point where it is hard to fix and you no longer desire to be touched or loved in a sexual way. You don’t want them to try anymore or you may even have thoughts about someone else you know can satisfy you. Have you ever been told that your partner didn’t get off and wasn’t satisfied? If you say no then I know your lying. We all have been told at some point. It doesn’t feel good especially after you had a long night of sex and then to be told I’m not satisfied. Horrible, tell me right then and now. Don’t wait until I’m about to go to sleep and tell me that dumb shit. You snooze you lose! (Guess that’s a little touchy for me, lol)
Emotionally: The biggest part of dealing with a relationship is the emotions. You have to be physically and mentally ready to deal with someone’s emotions. You can’t expect to be intimate with a person and not deal the emotional consequence that comes with it. Can you be sexual with a person and not be emotionally attached? Sure you can but if it’s not a one night stand and you still have to deal with this person you’re going to have deal with that person’s feelings. When you start off the relationship things are built on feelings and emotions. You start to care about everything person says, does and who this person is matters to you. You can become emotionally drained in a relationship if the communication is off. I didn’t single out communication as a subject to talk about because for me it goes great with emotions. I’ve learned that you aren’t responsible for other people’s emotions, but you are responsible if you hurt a person emotionally. Once you’ve hurt a person emotionally it takes a toll on everything else in the relationship. You began to think about everything that is going wrong in the relationship because of the hurt. Physically, you can start to gain or lose weight. Mentally, your mind is always wondering how you can fix things or if you want to stay. Sexually your no longer in tuned with the person and you question is there someone else that can make you happy. Your mind and heart are not in sync. Your heart could be telling you to let go, but your mind could be saying let’s figure some things out. It could also be the other way around. You may not think that because your heart isn’t in it that you won’t stay. Not true, your mind constantly tells you all the wrong things you’ve done and how you need to make it better. However, you heart is no longer in it. So what do you do now? Listen to your heart or mind? Still wondering are you? Well for me I think this is the biggest battle that I always fight. I want to follow my heart, but my mind always interferes with the hurt that I cause and need to repair.
I’m only human and sometimes I have to face the truth that I can’t expect anything to change if I don’t change how I see and feel things should be. The point is why settle for less when you know you deserve more. Why fix something that isn’t worth fixing? Why be in an unhappy relationship with hopes of change? We all go through these issues and choose to remain unsatisfied. Until Next time
Mentally: I always feel that you have to be on the same page mentally in order for the relationship to grow and progress. How can you hold a conversation by yourself when you’re supposed to be in a relationship? What I mean by that is if the maturity level isn’t there for both partners, one of you or if not both will start to look for someone else who can hold a conversation and keep the interest going. Is it wrong you say? Yes, it’s wrong but if you’ve voiced that the conversations are no longer interesting and you’ve tried; what do you do? If all you do is argue and apologize for hurting your partner's feelings then what do you do? Do you keep on trying even though you’ve lost that spark of wanting to have those long lasting conversation that you use to have? Honestly, it’s either time to move on or keep on hoping something sparks up those late night conversations again. (My advice don't hurt yourself more than you have to)
Physically: This is simple. When you first started to date your partner you found them irresistible and you only had eyes for them. Well, when find yourself starting to notice and take the interest in the people around you, you may want to find out why the sudden eye-opener. It shouldn’t take a simple argument or fight to make you take a double take at someone that you never looked at in that way. We tend to start letting ourselves go and we believe that our partners should be okay. Nope, this is not true at all. If you didn’t have a baby or you don’t have a disease that causes weight gain, acne, bloating, etc... Then you don’t have an excuse to letting yourself go. I will say this goes for me as well and I’m making a change. Not only to please my partner but to be back to my old self. I’m not saying that I let myself go completely but to know that I’m not happy with some things means to start changing them immediately! It's true and the more you deny that everything is good even though your partner has voiced that it isn’t then please don’t be surprised when their eyes start roaming or they start comparing your old pictures to your new ones. (If they’re asking about why the change in your dressing, weight, activities then you need to pay attention)
Sexually: I’m going to start off by saying that I always strive to make sure that my partner is happy in this area. I know that I have an issue with not being satisfied and to know that my partner isn’t, offend me. It offends me because if there is something that I’m not doing right or they may not like, then something should be said right then. Why wait for it to get to a point where it is hard to fix and you no longer desire to be touched or loved in a sexual way. You don’t want them to try anymore or you may even have thoughts about someone else you know can satisfy you. Have you ever been told that your partner didn’t get off and wasn’t satisfied? If you say no then I know your lying. We all have been told at some point. It doesn’t feel good especially after you had a long night of sex and then to be told I’m not satisfied. Horrible, tell me right then and now. Don’t wait until I’m about to go to sleep and tell me that dumb shit. You snooze you lose! (Guess that’s a little touchy for me, lol)
Emotionally: The biggest part of dealing with a relationship is the emotions. You have to be physically and mentally ready to deal with someone’s emotions. You can’t expect to be intimate with a person and not deal the emotional consequence that comes with it. Can you be sexual with a person and not be emotionally attached? Sure you can but if it’s not a one night stand and you still have to deal with this person you’re going to have deal with that person’s feelings. When you start off the relationship things are built on feelings and emotions. You start to care about everything person says, does and who this person is matters to you. You can become emotionally drained in a relationship if the communication is off. I didn’t single out communication as a subject to talk about because for me it goes great with emotions. I’ve learned that you aren’t responsible for other people’s emotions, but you are responsible if you hurt a person emotionally. Once you’ve hurt a person emotionally it takes a toll on everything else in the relationship. You began to think about everything that is going wrong in the relationship because of the hurt. Physically, you can start to gain or lose weight. Mentally, your mind is always wondering how you can fix things or if you want to stay. Sexually your no longer in tuned with the person and you question is there someone else that can make you happy. Your mind and heart are not in sync. Your heart could be telling you to let go, but your mind could be saying let’s figure some things out. It could also be the other way around. You may not think that because your heart isn’t in it that you won’t stay. Not true, your mind constantly tells you all the wrong things you’ve done and how you need to make it better. However, you heart is no longer in it. So what do you do now? Listen to your heart or mind? Still wondering are you? Well for me I think this is the biggest battle that I always fight. I want to follow my heart, but my mind always interferes with the hurt that I cause and need to repair.
I’m only human and sometimes I have to face the truth that I can’t expect anything to change if I don’t change how I see and feel things should be. The point is why settle for less when you know you deserve more. Why fix something that isn’t worth fixing? Why be in an unhappy relationship with hopes of change? We all go through these issues and choose to remain unsatisfied. Until Next time
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