My Journey to Georgia. Part 15
I've been gone for along time, and believe me it wasn't done purposely. However I am determined to continue this blog and other things I have going on. From this point on I will try and post at least 2 blogs a week so that I will not fall so behind on the story that I have originally started. Thank for all your support and I appreciate all the comments. Lets get it in folks. I will not drag on the whole pregnancy part but will keep it going so that you can follow from where I left off.
He went with me to most of the doctor's appointment and I was happy that he was able to be there. However, he was there but his heart didn't seem like he was in it. I couldn't understand why he said he wanted to be with me but his mind and heart seem to be with somewhere else or with someone else. I remember the day I went into labor like it was yesterday. He was already at the house because I called him that morning when I came in from the doctor. She had told me that I was 2 cm, and that I wasn't going to have the baby until a couple of days. I looked at her and told her that I had planned on having the baby either that day or the next day. She told me that since, I was so small that I was going to have a 6 lb. baby no bigger than that. She said that she was going to be long but not to long. Anyway, I called him and told him that I was in pain and that I felt that the baby was going to come soon. He was no help at this point because he had just gotten off of work at 7 am and he was exhausted. I was in pain and ready to push this little girl out. She was being very stubborn and was not ready to come out. It had already been 24 hours and still no progress, just lots of pain and pressure. 48 hours passed by, a trip to the hospital and I was only 2 1/2 cm. I was becoming very agitated and wanted her out now. I couldn't sleep and all I could do is moan and groan and keep everyone up. Before. I left the hospital there was this nurse who told me that if I took a hot bath it that would work. I went home took a hot bath and it made me feel good until i got out and the pain started again but stronger. I laid in the bed and got out the bed and walked around. I'd had enough and went into the living room and sat at the edge of the couch and begin to push. I tapped my daughters father since he was sleeping through out all of my pacing back and forth. I told him that I was going to push and he opened one eye and lifted his eyebrow and told me if I push his baby on the floor I was going to be laying next to her. I told him that's fine, just as long as she's out of me. We called a cab because I was not waiting for the ambulance to come because they took forever.
My mother came with me and him to the hospital, I got there and the same nurse saw me and said back already. I was like yes and I hope this time I stay. I was checked out by the doctor and she said I was 5cm and they were going to prepare a room for me. Thank the lord because I was ready to get her out. I finally got my room and the pain was unbearable and I wanted drugs. My mother was oppose to me getting an epidural but I didn't care. The nurse looked at my mother than at me and asked me if i still wanted to get it. I kindly told her that i was the damn patient and I couldn't take the pain anymore. It had been almost 36 hours and I couldn't take it anymore. My mother called me stupid and said that she never got any drugs with me or my siblings. I called her a trooper and told her good for her. Once the procedure was over, I instantly felt relief and was sleepy. I don't remember too much from that point on except the doctor came in and told me I was ready to push. She asked me if I felt the contractions because they were really strong, I laughed and said nope I don't feel a thing. She told me that she would tell me when I needed to push. Two pushes and my baby girl was brought in the world March, 01 2001 at 1:19pm, weighing 7lbs 10oz. My doctor had been so wrong about me having a small baby and I was definitely going to let her know it. She put her on my chest and I remember asking why didn't she cry (still drugged up) they rubbed her back really hard and she let out this little sound and closed her eyes back. My little mama was just as tired as I was, I told him to come and take her off of me. I remember pushing one last time for the after birth and I passed right back out. I woke up to him holding her and looking out the window, he looked over at me and mouthed Thank you. I was so happy that she was out but I fell right back to sleep. Woke up again, to a bunch of folks in my room and taking pictures of me and my new family. The next day the nurse brought in my baby girl and she was sleeping so peacefully, I couldn't believe god had blessed me with such a beautiful baby girl. I had some visitors, I was still drowsy from the drugs which i felt was wired. Now the next day was when reality to hit me, the nurse that brought her in was not the same nice nurse that fed and changed her the day before. She came in and was like mommy its time to feed the baby and change her. I looked her and looked down at the baby who was staring right at me. I was like dang she couldn't feed her, but I kept that to myself. I got up and fed her and changed her. I was not knew to feeding and changing babies. I am the oldest of eight remember. However this little girl didn't want to go back to sleep, she just started crying for some reason. I was like what is wrong with you. I got up and walked her around and she stopped crying and as soon as I sat back down she started crying again. I couldn't believe this little girl was already trying to be the boss of me. I got up and walked towards the window and she stopped crying and opened her little eyes like she could see out the window. I told her that i don't know what her daddy had told her but I a was not about to stand in front of the window and hold her. She looked at me and rolled her little eyes close. I laughed and walked back toward the bed and laid her down. She opened her eyes and started to cry, I said little girl you going to cut that out right now. It was like she knew what I was talking about and stopped. He came in right after that and picked her up and took her back to that damn window. I asked him what did he say to her, and he said its between me and my baby girl. I said whatever and told him he needed to make sure he's here when she start crying because she wants to be by the window.
I took her home and everyone came over to see her and take pictures. I didn't feel like being bother but smiled and entertain everyone that came up to see my little princess. Now, no one ever told me that the next couple of days I was going to be in so much pain because the milk in my breast was going to be heavy as hell. I had a fever and was not feeling well, he was there but asked me was it okay for him to go to my cousins party. I couldn't believe he was serious and I said I didn't care what he did. He left and for some reason I knew right then me and his daughter was not going to be first priority in his life. I woke up in the middle of the night in pain and crying. I knew I needed to get up and feed the baby but I could hardly move because of the pain. My mother told me to take a hot shower and she would feed the baby. I took a shower and felt a little better and called him to come back home to tend the baby because I had a fever. No response on his cell and I didn't bother leaving a message. I feel back to sleep and jumped up about 4am because I knew I needed to feed her. I got up to look at her and notice that a bottle had been propped up in on her blanket and she was drinking a bottle. I know I didn't do it because I was asleep, and I picked her up and finished feeding her and put her back to sleep. He came right in afterwards and asked was everything was okay and I told him does it look like everything is okay. He said he was tired and that he didn't have the strength to argue. I said and I didn't have the strength to feed my child but I did. He asked if I wanted him to leave and I told him I didn't care. He left and went home, and I told him don't bother coming back. He looked at me and asked what I meant by that. I just shook my head and told him to leave. The next morning, I asked my parents and siblings did they feed the baby at night and why would they prop a bottle up for her to eat. Everyone said they didn't do it and my parents said they wouldn't have done that with her being so young. I was confused and took as God had my back and sent one of his angels to watch over my baby girl... To be cont.
He went with me to most of the doctor's appointment and I was happy that he was able to be there. However, he was there but his heart didn't seem like he was in it. I couldn't understand why he said he wanted to be with me but his mind and heart seem to be with somewhere else or with someone else. I remember the day I went into labor like it was yesterday. He was already at the house because I called him that morning when I came in from the doctor. She had told me that I was 2 cm, and that I wasn't going to have the baby until a couple of days. I looked at her and told her that I had planned on having the baby either that day or the next day. She told me that since, I was so small that I was going to have a 6 lb. baby no bigger than that. She said that she was going to be long but not to long. Anyway, I called him and told him that I was in pain and that I felt that the baby was going to come soon. He was no help at this point because he had just gotten off of work at 7 am and he was exhausted. I was in pain and ready to push this little girl out. She was being very stubborn and was not ready to come out. It had already been 24 hours and still no progress, just lots of pain and pressure. 48 hours passed by, a trip to the hospital and I was only 2 1/2 cm. I was becoming very agitated and wanted her out now. I couldn't sleep and all I could do is moan and groan and keep everyone up. Before. I left the hospital there was this nurse who told me that if I took a hot bath it that would work. I went home took a hot bath and it made me feel good until i got out and the pain started again but stronger. I laid in the bed and got out the bed and walked around. I'd had enough and went into the living room and sat at the edge of the couch and begin to push. I tapped my daughters father since he was sleeping through out all of my pacing back and forth. I told him that I was going to push and he opened one eye and lifted his eyebrow and told me if I push his baby on the floor I was going to be laying next to her. I told him that's fine, just as long as she's out of me. We called a cab because I was not waiting for the ambulance to come because they took forever.
My mother came with me and him to the hospital, I got there and the same nurse saw me and said back already. I was like yes and I hope this time I stay. I was checked out by the doctor and she said I was 5cm and they were going to prepare a room for me. Thank the lord because I was ready to get her out. I finally got my room and the pain was unbearable and I wanted drugs. My mother was oppose to me getting an epidural but I didn't care. The nurse looked at my mother than at me and asked me if i still wanted to get it. I kindly told her that i was the damn patient and I couldn't take the pain anymore. It had been almost 36 hours and I couldn't take it anymore. My mother called me stupid and said that she never got any drugs with me or my siblings. I called her a trooper and told her good for her. Once the procedure was over, I instantly felt relief and was sleepy. I don't remember too much from that point on except the doctor came in and told me I was ready to push. She asked me if I felt the contractions because they were really strong, I laughed and said nope I don't feel a thing. She told me that she would tell me when I needed to push. Two pushes and my baby girl was brought in the world March, 01 2001 at 1:19pm, weighing 7lbs 10oz. My doctor had been so wrong about me having a small baby and I was definitely going to let her know it. She put her on my chest and I remember asking why didn't she cry (still drugged up) they rubbed her back really hard and she let out this little sound and closed her eyes back. My little mama was just as tired as I was, I told him to come and take her off of me. I remember pushing one last time for the after birth and I passed right back out. I woke up to him holding her and looking out the window, he looked over at me and mouthed Thank you. I was so happy that she was out but I fell right back to sleep. Woke up again, to a bunch of folks in my room and taking pictures of me and my new family. The next day the nurse brought in my baby girl and she was sleeping so peacefully, I couldn't believe god had blessed me with such a beautiful baby girl. I had some visitors, I was still drowsy from the drugs which i felt was wired. Now the next day was when reality to hit me, the nurse that brought her in was not the same nice nurse that fed and changed her the day before. She came in and was like mommy its time to feed the baby and change her. I looked her and looked down at the baby who was staring right at me. I was like dang she couldn't feed her, but I kept that to myself. I got up and fed her and changed her. I was not knew to feeding and changing babies. I am the oldest of eight remember. However this little girl didn't want to go back to sleep, she just started crying for some reason. I was like what is wrong with you. I got up and walked her around and she stopped crying and as soon as I sat back down she started crying again. I couldn't believe this little girl was already trying to be the boss of me. I got up and walked towards the window and she stopped crying and opened her little eyes like she could see out the window. I told her that i don't know what her daddy had told her but I a was not about to stand in front of the window and hold her. She looked at me and rolled her little eyes close. I laughed and walked back toward the bed and laid her down. She opened her eyes and started to cry, I said little girl you going to cut that out right now. It was like she knew what I was talking about and stopped. He came in right after that and picked her up and took her back to that damn window. I asked him what did he say to her, and he said its between me and my baby girl. I said whatever and told him he needed to make sure he's here when she start crying because she wants to be by the window.
I took her home and everyone came over to see her and take pictures. I didn't feel like being bother but smiled and entertain everyone that came up to see my little princess. Now, no one ever told me that the next couple of days I was going to be in so much pain because the milk in my breast was going to be heavy as hell. I had a fever and was not feeling well, he was there but asked me was it okay for him to go to my cousins party. I couldn't believe he was serious and I said I didn't care what he did. He left and for some reason I knew right then me and his daughter was not going to be first priority in his life. I woke up in the middle of the night in pain and crying. I knew I needed to get up and feed the baby but I could hardly move because of the pain. My mother told me to take a hot shower and she would feed the baby. I took a shower and felt a little better and called him to come back home to tend the baby because I had a fever. No response on his cell and I didn't bother leaving a message. I feel back to sleep and jumped up about 4am because I knew I needed to feed her. I got up to look at her and notice that a bottle had been propped up in on her blanket and she was drinking a bottle. I know I didn't do it because I was asleep, and I picked her up and finished feeding her and put her back to sleep. He came right in afterwards and asked was everything was okay and I told him does it look like everything is okay. He said he was tired and that he didn't have the strength to argue. I said and I didn't have the strength to feed my child but I did. He asked if I wanted him to leave and I told him I didn't care. He left and went home, and I told him don't bother coming back. He looked at me and asked what I meant by that. I just shook my head and told him to leave. The next morning, I asked my parents and siblings did they feed the baby at night and why would they prop a bottle up for her to eat. Everyone said they didn't do it and my parents said they wouldn't have done that with her being so young. I was confused and took as God had my back and sent one of his angels to watch over my baby girl... To be cont.
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