My journey to Georgia. Part 16
He came back the same day, I guess he needed to get a change of clothes and take a shower. I really didn't expect to see him that day. He came in and washed his hands and went to pick up the baby. She actually started crying when he picked her and he couldn't understand why she was crying. I told him that she was hungry and that he could feed her if he wanted to. I warmed the bottle and gave it to him to feed her. My mother went over to him and showed him how to fix the blanket and showed him how to hold her head. He told her he knew what he was doing and he appreciated it. I seen the frustration in his eyes and I told him that she's just trying to help. He gave me the look like, he's not saying anything because she's my mother. He went into the room and decided to feed her in there instead in the living room with everyone else. I heard her crying and went to go check on why. He said she'd finished her milk and he tried burping her but she wasn't having it. I took her from him and she immediately stopped crying and I burped her. He laid back on the bed and said in defeat that his baby girl doesn't like him. I told him that he was crazy but I did notice that anytime he picked her she would start to whine. I knew it was because she knew who had made her mommy cry all those long nights. Her daddy was the person that made her mommy sad and cry. I didn't tell him that but I already knew the bond between me and my baby girl will always be strong.
Our relationship was not where I wanted it to be and I was still crying and dealing with him being unfaithful. I would call him and he wouldn't call right back, anything could've been wrong with the baby and he seem not to care. I started to talking to my godmother who lived in Georgia and she told me that I should come down to visit. I knew he would have a problem with it but at the point I was at, I needed to get away because I couldn't take the pain anymore. She was only 2 months old and, if leaving New York for a little while would give me some serenity than by god I was leaving. I told my parents first and they were not happy at all. I told them that I was only going to visit, but they had no idea that I was going to move down for good. I finally spoke to my daughters father, and he cried and told me that I was trying to take his baby away. I told him that I needed this time to regroup and that I would be back. He didn't believe me and I had to really give him some assurance that I would be back. I asked his mom for a suitcase and told her that I was going to Georgia. She too was concerned, that I would not come back and I told her that I was indeed coming back. I told her that I was only going for a couple of weeks. She begged me, to please bring her grandbaby back to home. I was really surprised by everyone's reaction but that still didn't deter me from my plans. My godmother purchased a ticket for me to get on the Amtrak. i wasn't to thrilled about planes at the time so there was no way I was taking a flight anywhere. He helped me pack and kept asking me was I coming back with his baby. I looked at him and told him that I was and he didn't have anything to worry about. He took me to Penn station so that I could get on the train to Georgia. I was anxious and nervous because I didn't know if I would like being down there with my baby girl.
I arrived in Georgia, ready for a new life. I got there early enough to go to the mall and enjoy the beautiful weather. My godmother was happy to see me and I was happy to see her to. My god sister was also living in Georgia at the time, and she was pregnant with her first child. My godmother lived in Stone Mountain at the time, right near Kingston train station. I remember when she first moved down to Georgia, she lived in Norcross. I like Norcross because it was quiet and wasn't as busy like where she was at now. I unpacked me and the baby's clothes and got settled in. My godmother took her right away and just held on to her. My baby girl had a head full of hair and I had her hair put up in some ponytails. My god sister lived with her baby's father and he was someone I knew from Queens, NY. He was a sweetheart and she was very mean to him, her pregnancy had made her totally a grumpy lady...lol. The first couple of days were fine but I started to miss home already. I spoke to everyone to let them know I got there safely, my mom wanted to ask me 21 questions about everything. I did tell them that I was thinking about staying there for good and my step father was furious with me and didn't want to speak to me. My mother told me she understood and knew I had to do what was best for me and my daughter. I spoke to my daughters dad and he wasn't happy at all and asked when I was going to come home. I told him my plans and he said he had a feeling that I wasn't going to come back. I told him that I was sorry but I wasn't happy with the way our relationship was going and that I needed to be away from him. He hung up the phone on me but before he did he said he couldn't believe that I would hurt him like this. I thought to myself I couldn't believe that you would be calling the next chick while I'm in labor with your child. He didn't know I had found out from my friend that over him talking to someone over the phone. He didn't notice that she was right behind him when he told the chick he was at the hospital with his friend who was giving birth. Friend my ass, is exactly why he was going to be by himself. Maybe not by himself but no longer with me and my baby girl. Things seem to be going alright but some drama started and I was not feeling what was going on around me. My god sister was tripping, the pregnancy was making her a real bitch and I felt like I wanted to snap. My godmother was tripping, she told me that she would help me with my baby girl and I could work or go to school. I was going on job interviews and all. Then all of sudden she was saying that she was not going to keep the baby and that I needed to find a daycare. Negative I was not putting my newborn in daycare or letting anyone keep my baby. I was ready to go back home and now I needed to find away for me to go back. I was only there for a month and I called my step father and ask could he get me home. He told me that I would have to wait 2 weeks if I wanted to take the plane but that he could pay for me to take the greyhound back home. I was fine with that (so I though) as long I could go home. I didn't know how I was going to tell my Godmother that I was ready to leave and that I couldn't stay any longer. To be cont.
Our relationship was not where I wanted it to be and I was still crying and dealing with him being unfaithful. I would call him and he wouldn't call right back, anything could've been wrong with the baby and he seem not to care. I started to talking to my godmother who lived in Georgia and she told me that I should come down to visit. I knew he would have a problem with it but at the point I was at, I needed to get away because I couldn't take the pain anymore. She was only 2 months old and, if leaving New York for a little while would give me some serenity than by god I was leaving. I told my parents first and they were not happy at all. I told them that I was only going to visit, but they had no idea that I was going to move down for good. I finally spoke to my daughters father, and he cried and told me that I was trying to take his baby away. I told him that I needed this time to regroup and that I would be back. He didn't believe me and I had to really give him some assurance that I would be back. I asked his mom for a suitcase and told her that I was going to Georgia. She too was concerned, that I would not come back and I told her that I was indeed coming back. I told her that I was only going for a couple of weeks. She begged me, to please bring her grandbaby back to home. I was really surprised by everyone's reaction but that still didn't deter me from my plans. My godmother purchased a ticket for me to get on the Amtrak. i wasn't to thrilled about planes at the time so there was no way I was taking a flight anywhere. He helped me pack and kept asking me was I coming back with his baby. I looked at him and told him that I was and he didn't have anything to worry about. He took me to Penn station so that I could get on the train to Georgia. I was anxious and nervous because I didn't know if I would like being down there with my baby girl.
I arrived in Georgia, ready for a new life. I got there early enough to go to the mall and enjoy the beautiful weather. My godmother was happy to see me and I was happy to see her to. My god sister was also living in Georgia at the time, and she was pregnant with her first child. My godmother lived in Stone Mountain at the time, right near Kingston train station. I remember when she first moved down to Georgia, she lived in Norcross. I like Norcross because it was quiet and wasn't as busy like where she was at now. I unpacked me and the baby's clothes and got settled in. My godmother took her right away and just held on to her. My baby girl had a head full of hair and I had her hair put up in some ponytails. My god sister lived with her baby's father and he was someone I knew from Queens, NY. He was a sweetheart and she was very mean to him, her pregnancy had made her totally a grumpy lady...lol. The first couple of days were fine but I started to miss home already. I spoke to everyone to let them know I got there safely, my mom wanted to ask me 21 questions about everything. I did tell them that I was thinking about staying there for good and my step father was furious with me and didn't want to speak to me. My mother told me she understood and knew I had to do what was best for me and my daughter. I spoke to my daughters dad and he wasn't happy at all and asked when I was going to come home. I told him my plans and he said he had a feeling that I wasn't going to come back. I told him that I was sorry but I wasn't happy with the way our relationship was going and that I needed to be away from him. He hung up the phone on me but before he did he said he couldn't believe that I would hurt him like this. I thought to myself I couldn't believe that you would be calling the next chick while I'm in labor with your child. He didn't know I had found out from my friend that over him talking to someone over the phone. He didn't notice that she was right behind him when he told the chick he was at the hospital with his friend who was giving birth. Friend my ass, is exactly why he was going to be by himself. Maybe not by himself but no longer with me and my baby girl. Things seem to be going alright but some drama started and I was not feeling what was going on around me. My god sister was tripping, the pregnancy was making her a real bitch and I felt like I wanted to snap. My godmother was tripping, she told me that she would help me with my baby girl and I could work or go to school. I was going on job interviews and all. Then all of sudden she was saying that she was not going to keep the baby and that I needed to find a daycare. Negative I was not putting my newborn in daycare or letting anyone keep my baby. I was ready to go back home and now I needed to find away for me to go back. I was only there for a month and I called my step father and ask could he get me home. He told me that I would have to wait 2 weeks if I wanted to take the plane but that he could pay for me to take the greyhound back home. I was fine with that (so I though) as long I could go home. I didn't know how I was going to tell my Godmother that I was ready to leave and that I couldn't stay any longer. To be cont.
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